I can't stand to see him hurt
Sad people make me sadder
I hate that he's shut me out
And would rather wallow
I hate that he drinks
I hate that he acts like I'm dead
He acts like I never existed
And that it STILL makes me cry
I hate that he bleeds
Oozes words and booze and lies
Spins his line of bullshit
And I STILL read it!
Hate that I want him back
That I wasted 8 months of my life on him
Hate that I cry myself to sleep at night
And want only to make him smile...
So, you're mourning the lose of an alcoholic who now pretends you don't exist? Let's repeat that phrase, an alcoholic who now pretends you don't exist? One more time for the really dense people, AN ALCOHOLIC WHO NOW PRETENDS YOU DON'T EXIST.
ReplyDeleteYou dodged a bullit; consider yourself lucky you only lost eight months out of your life.
Okay. What gives? Do you hate him?
ReplyDeleteHe's so much more than that.
I'm trying to move past it. I use writing as a way to suck out the venom, you know? So that every time I write something I feel better--stronger. It's healing.
But you have a point.
I just wish that he'd be friends. He knows I'd never hurt him. I don't understand why we can't be friends.
He knows you'll never hurt him, but it's ok for him to hurt you? He won't be friends with you because he knows you'll always be waiting, hoping to be more than friends. And the only thing that matters to an addict is the next high.
ReplyDeleteHe went a month without drinking. He could stop if he wanted to...
ReplyDeleteIt isn't right to drag this shit out here. Would you to email?